Just a small town girl
livin in a lonely world
she took the midnight train going anywhere
So that's kinda life right now. I'm scared to post anything that matters to me under my real name. It's like, there's this giant magnifying glass that blasts everything out of proportion. I almost cheated on my girlfriend with an Egyptian after we connected, after I told him I supported his people's side. Anonymous has sided with the "war on terror." I'm transgender. Everyone where I live, everyone I've known for the most part gets that. The Egyptian gets that. My parents don't care. My girlfriend really doesn't get it at all-- her family seems to judge me, and I think she can't stand it. But we love each other.
Where was I? Stream of consciousness, get it out. My life is lies. I want to talk about VPNs. I think I like Saudi Arabian YouTube better than I do American YouTube. Hard to explain.
I want to date the Egyptian I met. We met on a transexual dating site and he said we wouldn't have to date, we could just be "special friends." He said "things happen for a reason" and invited me to get to know him.
Anonymous has joined the "war on terror." They had good reason. More people get caught. I was kind of trying to almost join Anon-- hence the sn. Had I had the opportunity, I would have.
I don't know the issues. Does anybody? I read between lines better than most. Crimes of war have happened in both sides. What gives, Anon? Just going after opponents now?
The man from Egypt-- we spent the whole night talking and I never saw him, but he was a total hottie I'm sure he was really cute, because he was a total gentleman like no one I'd ever met. I'd be embarrassed if someone told him. I might be really mad, cause I don't think I'm ever going to date him even if we remember each others' screen names. Although he never finished installing Skype, maybe, maybe he will add me to it when he has. I sent him an invite.
My cousin is Iranian.
He fled the country with my birth cousin after 9/11, and I don't think it's okay. They had to run from death threats and stuff that make it hard to care about language, even though this is my first post....
working hard to get my fill
everybody wants a thrill
paying anything to roll the dice
I'm going insane, even in this artificial peace. My life was mental healthcare, in a nutshell. Now, for now, I am free. I am terrified of when it shatters. I want to take a sledgehammer and break it apart myself.
My cousin was Iranian. He did a lot of big-time business overseas after having to flee. He followed my birth-cousin back home to the US when she took off with their children because his kids were so travel-weary, they were.... worse off than I was living with my parents in the head, tired of boarding schools, tired of being second class citizens and everyone's guests but never hosts.
I'm starting to cry as I release.
Forget it. Everyone knows no one reads anything long.
Don't stop believing
Hold onto that feeling
I want to do a hundred things illegal. I want to shatter the chains that bind me as a citizen in a "repressive regime," under Obama, like Bush's. I'm not sure if it's safe to post this part, because I'm worried of someone tracing me from gov, and I know in reality my tracks aren't covered that perfectly.
I also know that in the South people still talk about rebellion... or maybe do again. They speak of Civil War in quiet conversations when they know each other, but I don't actually know anyone right now and wanting to virtually fleece the government of information isn't kosher.
One thing, Anon. Screw it. Like now I've got this sn, I'm the bad chic who was busy to do what she was told on it, and I don't even want to post your videos like you suggested in the video that supposedly makes me a member of Anonymous now. Well, I will be anonymous.
Don't stop believing
Hold onto that feeling
I'm just a small town girl
livin in a lonely world
I'll take the midnight train goin' anywhere.
